The Beauty of Burdens

“What do you need all that dry ice for?”

I’m used to the question at this point.

Buying 50 lbs at 7:00am on a Monday piques the curiosity of every United Supermarkets cashier.

They’ve all asked the same question or something similar.

But if they are going to ask, I’m going to tell them.

“My wife is doing chemo, and this is for her cold capping system so she doesn’t lose her hair.”

They don’t know how to respond.

That was not what they were expecting to hear.

I promise you that.

It always takes them a moment or two to compose themselves.

The guy today, after the shock wore off, said, “My dad did chemo. Lost all of his hair.”

It’s a common response.

When they hear “my wife has cancer,” the response is almost always the same.

“My brother,” or “my grandma,” or “my cousin,” or “my neighbor has cancer.”

Or had cancer.

Maybe that’s helpful.

We are not so high and mighty on people having the proper response to her illness. There is no protocol for this stuff. We are all just doing the best we can.

I just find it interesting how almost all humans respond similarly.

“Do you know so and so? She has cancer too.”

Or, “She did have cancer too.”

Trying to connect hardships.

I read in a book about someone else dealing with cancer that her favorite, or most helpful, response to her situation was a genuine:

“I’m so sorry this is happening to you.”

And that was it.

As I walked the aisle of chemo patient after chemo patient after chemo patient today — all in “suites” (we were in suite 25 today, and suite is quite the generous term) — I wanted to go up to each of them, grab their hand, look them in the eyes, and sincerely and emotionally tell them:

I am so sorry this is happening to you.

And I mean it with everything within me.

When you experience hardship, you then have a superpower — the ability to mean things with the depth of who you are.

And you can carry it without others, because you have strength from hardships once walked through.

Galatians 6:2:

“Carry each other’s burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ.”

The beauty of burdens.

We can carry our own, so we have the strength to carry others’.

And when trials do come — and they will — we can feel it in our bones when we say:

I’m so sorry this is happening to you.